You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
My hand turned me down
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
