Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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