i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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