Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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