It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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