Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
