Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
