I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize