i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
