she looked like the before picture.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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