The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
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I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
sex in a hospital.. check
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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