do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
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bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
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I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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