i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
