Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize