No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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