when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize