Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Randomize
