I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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