Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
