Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
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He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
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It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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