I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize