I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
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