No awkward lesbian experiences without me
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
