The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
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