its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
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Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
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I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
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