so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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