Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Randomize
