trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
