With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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