it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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