have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
