your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Randomize
