you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
You are a genius and a whore.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
