Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
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