thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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