similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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