We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
i came on her dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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