Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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