sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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