Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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