Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(908): View more from New Jersey

no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(908): no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request http://tfl.nu/jdk4

Replies (18) Good night (4045) Bad night (1032)
Favorite
(615): View more from Tennessee

He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(615): He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys." http://tfl.nu/9d5s

Replies (23) Good night (1939) Bad night (5125)
Favorite
(847): View more from Illinois

Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(847): Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party http://tfl.nu/77aw

Replies (15) Good night (6908) Bad night (726)
Favorite
(315): View more from New York

I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(315): I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong. http://tfl.nu/20fz

Replies (26) Good night (7361) Bad night (1088)
Favorite
(515): View more from Iowa

I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(515): I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy. http://tfl.nu/r54x

Replies (8) Good night (857) Bad night (5874)
Favorite
(443): View more from Maryland

her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(443): her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does" http://tfl.nu/16y8

Replies (16) Good night (2187) Bad night (6960)
Favorite
(229): View more from Georgia

He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(229): He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him. http://tfl.nu/c2pz

Replies (12) Good night (6654) Bad night (1222)
Favorite
(585): View more from New York

I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(585): I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking.. http://tfl.nu/q39t

Replies (10) Good night (3556) Bad night (931)
Favorite
(206): View more from Washington

Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(206): Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me? http://tfl.nu/2o7o

Replies (8) Good night (1489) Bad night (582)
Favorite
(402): View more from Nebraska

Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(402): Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem... http://tfl.nu/aasf

Replies (2) Good night (834) Bad night (391)
Favorite
(757): View more from Virginia

Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(757): Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant. http://tfl.nu/nvyb

Replies (8) Good night (595) Bad night (1049)
Favorite
(985): View more from Louisiana

No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(985): No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did. http://tfl.nu/hp4k

Replies (3) Good night (748) Bad night (419)
Favorite
(425): View more from Washington

What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(425): What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship? http://tfl.nu/30k4

Replies (5) Good night (615) Bad night (342)
Favorite
(402): View more from Nebraska

I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(402): I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate. http://tfl.nu/efz3

Replies (5) Good night (681) Bad night (398)
Favorite
(570): View more from Pennsylvania

My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?

(570): View more from Pennsylvania

Welcome to adulthood.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(570): My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday? (570): Welcome to adulthood. http://tfl.nu/hzr7

Replies (4) Good night (379) Bad night (217)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard