Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
