Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i just made my gag reflex go away.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
