I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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