drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Randomize