Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize