Having a random hookup so left but love u
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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