: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
