His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
