I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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